Flash of Fright

I walked in from the grocery store last evening to find my 2-year old golden retriever, Shelby, laying lifeless on the kitchen floor. I dropped all of my bags, jars shattering, and screaming to my husband upstairs, fell on top of her to see what was wrong. She had a scarf wrapped around her neck, and in either trying to get it off, or stepping on it or whatever, had caused the scarf to tighten and tighten until she could not breathe. The scarf was ripped and shredded, the fabric caught in her toenails until they were bleeding.

Screaming and bawling -- I kid you not, have you ever seen a lifeless being? It's terrifying! -- I ripped the scarf from her neck. No, I didn't pull it off, or loosen it. I ripped it in my hulk rage. She opened her eyes and looked at me, put her paw on me and just laid there a moment. Then she stood up, shook it off and started licking me profusely.

 If I hadn't walked in at that moment, she'd be a gonner. One extra traffic light, one extra thing at the store, anything could have changed the outcome of that scene. I love this damn dog so much it hurts. I lost my first golden retriever to a stroke at 6 months old due to a birth defect. I lost my border collie to epilepsy. This golden collie is the best of both of these pets. She's my baby, and seeing her lifeless left me with nightmares all night. I couldn't shake it.

We get so attached to our animals -- we, as in me -- I realize not everyone does. What this dog gives BACK to our family is indescribable. She takes care of our kids. She takes care of us. She makes us laugh, keeps me running every day, and is the best playmate ever. Life would be tragic without her. I know I'll lose her someday, that's the thing about pets, it's so short-lived. But thank heaven that someday wasn't yesterday. #toosoon #notready