The last 10 or so days have been the toughest on me physically than I've ever experienced. But something good always comes from something bad - and this has been a huge AHA realization for me. Here are some things that I can thank major surgery/recovery for:
1. My husband has taken over all of the household duties for the first time in our decade-long marriage. For the first time, he is seeing and appreciating the work behind the scenes that it takes to maintain a household. "How do you do all of this?" he keeps asking. "I'm so tired; no wonder you crash at 8 at night." HELLO!! I have a feeling that work will be more evenly divided when all is said and done, and more gratitude dished out as well.
2. My children are going to bed easier, sooner and sleeping better. They know they can't jump into bed with us because it might hurt mommy. So if they wake up, they are supposed to potty or get a drink and go right back to bed. And it's working!
3. I have learned that a perfect-looking, organized home is not necessary all of the time. I have rested perfectly well with stuff laying around, dust particles in sight and a leaf trail on the carpet. I realize now that my obsession with cleanliness is just OCD busiwork and not necessary for happiness.
4. The ability to do laundry is not just learned - it is a true gift. Sure, my clothes are clean, but it's missing love or something. It's hard to explain - I will continue "allowing" my husband to do laundry on a regular basis, but will relish that soft, fluffy towel that I laundered when it comes around.
5. Letting others help is not a sign of weakness. It's a sign of humanness. It's something I've lacked until now. For the FIRST TIME today, my 6 year old son is playing at a friend's house. My daughter stayed multiple days with other people. Dinners have been provided. And I have genuinely enjoyed and appreciated all of it. I really DON'T have to carry the torch all of the time in order for the world to keep spinning.
6. Having a church home is something that CANNOT be underestimated. Our pastor and his wife have provided such unconditional support to our family - no strings, no qualms, no preconceptions - just sheer love and kindness. I was hesitant to ask for their support because we aren't yet members - "Maybe not, but you are child of God and we'll always be here for you" was their response. Wow.
7. Flowers really are nice to get. I have always boo-hooed them because of the expense. But every time I got a new bouquet, I piece of me lit up. It's just nice.
8. Knowing that had we not had our children when we did - before we met all of our career and financial goals - that we wouldn't have them at all now means that I have taken more time to soak up every minute detail of their existence. I see things about them I never really took time to notice or think about because I realize what a perfect and precious gift they really are.
9. I went more than a week without running to the aide of my mother for the first time in my adult life. I allowed my dad to take time off to help her and focused on myself, something that I don't normally do. Guess what? She's fine. And so am I.
10. When you take time to realize that life is good, you can drown out all of the bad for more time than you realize. It's always there, but it truly is how you perceive it. We have some seriously rough roads ahead, but the cliche about having each other really is true. With faith, hope and love - I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me.
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